Hello Again (Readers)! I just started a FB page where husbands can encourage each other to love their wives. It’s a great place to post ideas for dates, acts of love, words of advice, etc., or to receive encouragement for your own relationship. Here’s the link if you want to like the page and join the conversation: https://www.facebook.com/husbandsloveyourwife1
You may have noticed (*cough cough*) that there have been long periods of time between my posts. Life is busy, that’s for sure, but life was busy this last year and I was still able to manage a consistent posting schedule. So here’s the reason why my posts have been sporadic–I got burned out with the blog. Seriously burned out. But what should I have expected? I took on a project of enormous proportions.
To my credit, I did the most important part of the project consistently and right to the very end, that is, the daily acts of love. But once I hit that 366th day, it’s like something in me shut off and posting on the blog become torturous work. I think the breaks have been good for me, then. I needed that time of rest and refreshment that I got. If I would’ve posted to the end, I would’ve grown to detest this project very much. As it is, though, the project is dear to me and I’m so proud of the stuff we’ve accomplished through it. I think it’ll be dear to you as well.
By not posting consistently, I may have disappointed my readers. That’s fine, as long as the one reader for which I actually did the blog is well pleased. [Don’t get me wrong, readers; I appreciate you very much.]
I’m not saying that I’ll now post every day until I finish. I hope I do. But I am saying that I’m ready and excited to finish up 365 and to present it to you. I’m also excited to extend the habits that I formed through 365 to every day of the rest of our lives.
Here’s my modest goal and my commitment to you and my readers: I’ll have 365 Acts of Love finished by Valentine’s Day so that I can present it to you then.
On day 345, I got up before everyone else and cleaned our house for two hours. If I hadn’t done this, we would’ve had to clean our house together after the girls went to sleep. Instead, you were able to relax a little that evening.
On day 344, I cleaned your bike for you while you were gone at your parents’ house. It hadn’t been cleaned for a while, so it really needed it. You really appreciated this act and even took your shiny bike out for a spin.
I decided midday on day 343 that, rather than commit a planned act for you, I would just describe the acts that I did for you up to that point in the day. I did this without considering beforehand how the morning went. I just wanted to see what the morning looked like. Was I selfish? Did I put you first? Did I serve you naturally or did it take some effort? I know this isn’t a very scientific experiment because I’m only looking at the results from a single morning rather than an extended period of time. Regardless, here are the results:
I let you sleep in while I watched the kids, I washed the dishes, I made us dinner in our crockpot, I read to our oldest for her schooling, I gave you a back massage, and I watched the kids while you took a shower.
As I think about it, this was not a typical morning (case in point: I gave you a back massage). I spend many mornings on myself. For example, every Saturday morning, you watch the kids while I go on a two-hour bike ride. When I get back, you usually have breakfast cooked for me and the girls fed. After my breakfast, you watch the kids while I take a shower.
But here’s something I noticed about my experiment. The things I did for you/us came naturally and without thinking. That’s not always the case. Sometimes I get upset if I feel like I’m carrying more of the load. But at least there are times when serving you/our family comes naturally. I thank God for giving me the grace to do that. And I’m positive that when you watch the kids and do stuff for me, you’re not typically thinking it’s a big deal. After all, we’re a team.
Wait: I forgot to tell you about one of my acts for day 343. I was making a sandwich for my lunch when you asked me if I would make you one. I said, as seriously as ever, “You’ve got two hands. Why don’t you make it.” Your mouth dropped in shock. I then proceeded to sit down and eat my sandwich while you went to the kitchen to make yours. Go team!
I missed day 340. I’m not sure why. I could say that it’s because it’s very difficult to come up with new and exciting acts of love and that my mind drew a blank that day. But that’s no excuse. You don’t want something new and interesting necessarily. Instead, you want something that expresses my love for you. My act could’ve been as simple as giving you a flower or a hug or some words of encouragement. This has been a great lesson for me this year.
I read and prayed through the chapter on sexuality in The Power of a Praying Husband for act 339. Mostly, I prayed for selflessness and purity in our sexuality. Regarding the former, I prayed that we would seek to make each other happy during our times of intimacy instead of focusing solely on ourselves. As for the latter, I prayed that we would both remain fully committed to each other sexually and that we would look to no one else for that kind of fulfillment. May romance, affection, and desire for each other become a mark of our relationship.