March 19, 2012
For my 171st act of love, I told you this: “Has anyone ever told you how beautiful your eyes are?” “Why?” you asked. “Because they’re so beautiful!”
I want to tell you, again, that I think you’re more beautiful than anyone I’ve ever seen or known. If I don’t tell you that often, I’m sorry.
PS: Maybe you were right to want that raincoat for our oldest: it rained Saturday and Sunday here. Looks like the joke’s on me.
February 28, 2012
I actually forgot to commit an act for you on Sunday. So I committed my 151st act of love on Monday morning.
A few days ago, we were watching something on our laptop when you told me that I never tell you you’re pretty. (“Never” in your language means “not often.” We would’ve fought much less over the years had I learned that as a newlywed.) This really irritated me, though I don’t think I showed it. I began to think of all that I do for you through 365* and was even tempted to show you the blog. Then, I calmed down and said, “I think I tell you you’re pretty quite a bit, but I’ll work on saying it more.” You then said that in addition to not often telling you that you’re pretty, I’m not specific enough when I do. You said I should mention what features of yours I think are pretty.*
After thinking over your comment some more, I realized you were right: I don’t often tell you you’re pretty and I don’t make my compliments about your beauty specific. So on Monday, I wrote “You’re beautiful” (and some variations of that) on 10 different notecards and placed them in various spots around the house. The trouble is, I forgot to follow your advice about being specific. You noticed. I’ll try to work on that, honey dear.
Thanks for voicing your criticism. Though I didn’t like hearing it at first, it’s good to know what I can do to improve. Also, it’s good that you’re open enough with me that you can tell me what it is about me or the way I act that’s bothering you.
*This was one of the dangers of 365 that I mentioned in an earlier post. I want 365 to be a free gift to you rather than leverage for me.
*Your comments weren’t out of the blue, but quite called for given the context of our conversation, which I didn’t reproduce here.
October 27, 2011
The other day you told me that you have a recurring dream in which I tell you you’re not the most beautiful person I know. It takes place at a party where I keep talking to other girls instead of you. When you ask me why I’m talking to them, I tell you that they’re prettier than you. Wow! Here’s something you need to know–the man in your dream is an impostor. Next time you see him, ask him a question that only I would know the answer to. I bet he’ll walk away flustered. When you told me about your dream, I responded with a joke (oops!). I guess that wasn’t the reaction you wanted. So, today I actually did something to assure you that I think you’re the most beautiful girl I know. I wrote you a letter praising your beauty and sent it to you in the mail. I can’t wait to see your reaction when you get that letter.
October 26, 2011
For my 27th act of love, I read to you from Song of Solomon and asked you to imagine that we were speaking to each other. Here are some verses that I emphasized as an expression of my thoughts for you:
Behold, you are beautiful, my love; behold, you are beautiful; your eyes are doves (1:15).
As a lily among brambles, so is my love among the young women (2:2).
You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you (4:7).
PS: Here’s one from our reading that I underplayed (though I’m sure those ANE women really swooned over it!)!
Your neck is like the tower of David, built in rows of stone (4:4).
October 22, 2011
Some men complain about their wives to each other. When I talk about you around other men, I want everything I say to be positive. Last night I went out with the groomsmen after the wedding rehearsal. I tried to find an opportunity to praise you in conversation with at least one of the guys. This ended up being difficult because none of our conversations were serious. However, on the way home, some of us began to talk about the women in our lives. One of the guys told me that I should count myself lucky to have you because you’re so incredible. Naturally, I took the opportunity to extol your virtues–that you’re stunningly beautiful, a godly woman of character, and super fun to be around–and I confessed that I don’t appreciate you like I should. The rest of the way home, we stopped at every place we could think of that might be open (it was 1 AM) to buy you some roses. Finally, we struck gold with a 7-Eleven. When you wake up tomorrow morning to a rose bouquet in a vase on the table, I hope you realize how beautiful you are to me and how much I love you.