I wanted us to (re)listen to the 4th CD of the Love and Respect Conference for Thursday’s act of love. When I suggested it, though, you said something to the effect that you were so exhausted that you only had enough energy to wash the dishes then go to bed. Tears formed in your eyes.
I was also exhausted. I’m talking about the head-throbbing, eye-burning, stomach-turning type. “It’d be nice if you could just skip the dishes and go to bed,” I said, “but they must be washed tonight.” You agreed. “What if I offer to wash them for her,” I thought. Everything inside me screamed “No!” at such a thought. Still, I blurted out, “Go to bed. I’ll wash the dishes.” “Are you sure?” “‘Yeah, I’m sure.” “I’ll tell you what. Why don’t you wash half the dishes, then I’ll wake up early to wash the rest,” you said. “Okay.” When you woke up in the morning, you were surprised that I actually took you up on your offer!
Before we got married, I never knew how much of a battle love is. It was certainly easy to “fall in love” with you. But when the intensity of those feelings faded, every day became an opportunity to decide who to put first, you or me. If I weren’t so self-seeking, perhaps willing the former would be easy. But, as it is, every day and even every hour is a battle to put your needs, desires, etc. first. To put you before me. May I stand strong in the midst of this battle.