Yesterday you received a dress from Amazon that I secretly ordered for you for Saturday’s Valentine’s date. I was curious to see your reaction because you almost never like the clothes I pick for you. You opened the package, pulled out the dress, and shrieked with delight. So far, so good. But—and this unnerved me—you smiled nervously when you tried it on. “Do you like it?” I asked. “Yeah,” you replied hesitantly. “Oh, man. I wonder if Amazon does returns,” I thought. “Tell me the truth. Do you like it?” “No.” So, we sent the dress back having found that Amazon does returns and ordered the dress of your choosing with two-day shipping (thanks, Amazon Prime!). Here’s the one you chose:
I’m not putting up a picture of the dress I originally bought in case it’s truly hideous.
Ideally, I wanted to surprise you by showing you the original dress for the first time on Saturday. But that seemed too risky: I knew that you’d wear the dress whether you liked it or not if I gave it to you then. And I didn’t want that. Oh, well. The date’s still going to be great!